NeverThat.com

I would actually stay awake in more meetings if they were this amusing. City counsel is serious business.

A difference of opinion over whether it was 11:25 a.m. or 11:30 a.m. allegedly led to an altercation between an Alamosa County commissioner and a resident who called him a liar at a county meeting.

The men apparently disagreed about the starting time of the public-comment period at a meeting Wednesday. The public is allowed to comment beginning at 11:25 a.m. Allen called a recess, returned at 11:30 a.m. and announced that “we are now starting to have public comment at 11:25 a.m.,” Moyer said.

Moyer said Allen “got up from the chair and he came almost running” toward Moyer, who was sitting 30 to 50 feet away.

Moyer said Allen hit him in the head and “the next thing I knew, I was on the floor.”

He said he didn’t know if Allen pushed him off the chair or he fell.

“And then he kicked me on the right side. That’s what really hurts me physically,” Moyer said.

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So if I’m fat I get more sex and can skip school? Load up the fried twinkies! This can not be true can it?

Obese elementary schoolchildren miss a couple more school days on average than their normal-weight classmates, according to a study that says being fat is a better predictor for absenteeism than any other factor.

Researchers said their results suggest that childhood obesity, in addition to serious medical issues, can lead to a plethora of additional problems down the road.

“It’s clear in all the literature that the more days of school you miss, it really sets you up for such negative outcomes: drugs and AIDS and (teen) pregnancy,” said Andrew B. Geier, a doctoral candidate at the University of Pennsylvania and lead author of the study released Friday.

Of 180 school days, researchers found that on average the normal weight students missed 10.1 days, overweight kids missed 10.9 days and obese children missed 12.2 days. For reasons that aren’t clear, underweight children had the fewest absences — 7.5 on average.

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Ive posted so many of these cases now. She was just teaching him how to stick that landing!! I would still hit it. Twice.

A former area cheerleading coach has been charged with taking indecent liberties with a minor. Tammie Fleming, 37, was arrested last Wednesday.

Powhatan authorities say she worked at Dominion Cheer and Tumble on Sommerville Court in Midlothian as a cheerleading coach when she had an intimate relationship with a 17-year old student.

Authorities say the relationship between Fleming and the boy had been ongoing for several months.

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Sounds a little fishy to me… What was the insurance policy???

Fendley was trying to start the mower in the garage of his two-story brick home in this Atlanta suburb when the machine burst into flames. Before he could extinguish the fire, it had spread through the garage.

Then his wife tried to toss a can of gasoline out a window as the blaze spread, but she missed, spreading the fuel “everywhere,” Fendley said.

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We do pagan rituals with bonfires in our back yard all the time, and the neighbors never complain.

A Waukesha woman was arrested early Tuesday morning for disturbing neighbors by yelling witch chants around a bonfire she built 10-feet from her home, police Capt. Mike Babe said.Brenna K. Barney, 42, told police that they were infringing on her religious beliefs since she is a Wiccan and she was performing a ritual because of a new moon, Babe said. She said her name is Brenna Raven Moonfire.

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Don’t drink and drive. You might hit a bump and spill your drink.

A man in Orange County suspected of driving drunk was captured Tuesday night after he jumped out of a vehicle and ran from officers still holding a beer in his hand, according to the sheriff’s deputies.

Deputies said they spotted a vehicle Tuesday night and attempted to stop the driver on suspicion he was driving drunk.

The driver then led police on a chase that ended on Mott Avenue in the Lockhart area.

Officers said the driver tried to run them down before jumping from the vehicle and running away.

The man was spotted fleeing while still clutching a beer.

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He should have tried rubbing their bellies, it makes them sleepy.

CAPE York stockman David George has spent seven nights up a tree in a crocodile-infested swamp, bleeding and with little food – and lived to tell the tale.

The father-of-one and co-manager at Silver Plains cattle station yesterday told his remarkable tale of survival and rescue by chopper in rugged bushland near Coen, in the state’s remote far north.

“Every night I was stalked by two crocs who would sit at the bottom of the tree staring up at me,” Mr George recalled yesterday.

“All I could see was two sets of red eyes below me and all night I had to listen to a big bull croc bellowing a bit further out.

“I’d yell out at them, ‘I’m not falling out of this tree for you bastards’.”

Dazed and bleeding after a tumble from his horse earlier this month, the bushie had given the horse its head in the pre-dawn dark to get him home – only to find it had taken him more than a kilometre into the heart of a croc swamp.

“I had to get off the horse and fall on the long 8ft-high swamp grass to clear a path, when I fell straight into a crocodile nest,” he said.

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Having lived in MO for some time I CAN SAY they are insane about the Bible belt crap. My friend brought me to one church and they were running around like chickens for some time, speaking in tongues, then they proceeded to beg us for money so they can drive around in nicer cars. It was insane. INSANE.

The first man shot in the rural Missouri church sanctuary was a grandfather of three who had shepherded the local community of Micronesian immigrants for about 15 years.

His uncle started apologizing to the gunman in an attempt to defuse the situation, a witness said. Instead he was shot next.

Members of the tightly knit Micronesian community struggled Monday to comprehend why a gunman stormed into their church service, killed three religious leaders, and wounded five others. All of those who died were Micronesian immigrants and pastors or associate pastors, family members said.

”He was a very generous, outgoing person,” Lou Rehobson-Manuel said of her brother, Kernal Rehobson, the first man killed in the Sunday rampage. ”He was kind of a shepherd for all our sheep.”

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I guess he doesn’t like older ladies. Maybe he has a mean one at home?

A 41-year-old man stormed a beauty salon and bludgeoned four grandmothers with a hammer, fracturing one’s skull, before making off with less than $90, police said.

A police investigator enters the salon where the attack took place.

Thomas Leyshon III, of Mountain Top, was arrested after a daylong manhunt Friday.

The women, ages 56 to 76, did not resist but were beaten anyway, witnesses said. At least one required surgery.

“It takes a coward to go after some old women,” said Andy Chopka, grandson of victim Jeanna Chopka.

Authorities allege Leyshon attacked a co-owner of Hairem Family Hair and Nail Care while demanding money from the register and the women’s purses.

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